Decoding Vicky Kaushal’s Viral Relationship Advice

3 min readNew DelhiUpdated: Apr 19, 2026 02:04 PM Arguments, conflicts, or what many, especially in northern India, casually call kalesh, are an unavoidable part of daily life—be it with partners, family members, or even colleagues. But how you respond in those moments can either resolve the issue or make it worse. Uri actor Vicky Kaushal once shared a relatable take on handling such situations.
“Always the way to navigate through a kalesh is to cater to the person who is most emotionally hurt. Don’t cater to logic; cater to emotions. Kalesh happens when one person is logical, and the other is emotional,” he said in an interview with ETimes while promoting his film The Great Indian Family (2023).
This article is based on information from the public domain and/or the experts we spoke to. 
But how accurate is this advice from a mental health perspective? We reached out to  Dr Anitha Chandra, Consultant – Psychiatry, to break it down.
Why emotions take over during conflicts
According to Dr Chandra, Vicky’s statement reflects a common psychological dynamic seen in arguments.
“In emotionally charged situations, the brain’s limbic system—the emotional centre—tends to dominate over the rational part. This is why logic alone often fails to resolve conflicts when someone is already hurt or overwhelmed,” she explains.
When one person is seeking emotional validation, and the other responds with facts or reasoning, it can feel dismissive—fueling the conflict further.Story continues below this ad
Vicky Kaushal and Katrina Kaif got married on December 9, 2021 (Image: Instagram/Vicky Kaushal)
Addressing emotions first can calm the situation
Dr Chandra agrees that acknowledging emotions is often the first step to de-escalation.
“When you validate someone’s feelings, it helps them feel heard and understood. This, in turn, reduces emotional intensity and makes them more open to lening,” she says.
Simple responses like “I understand why you’re upset” or “That must have been difficult for you” can go a long way in diffusing tension.

But logic still matters
While emotional validation is important, Dr Chandra cautions against completely ignoring logic. “If you only address emotions and not the underlying issue, the conflict may resurface. Sustainable resolution requires a balance of empathy and rational discussion,” she adds. In other words, emotions may open the door to resolution—but logic helps close it.Story continues below this ad
When this approach works best
This strategy is especially helpful in:

Personal relationships (partners, family, close friends)
Situations where one person feels hurt, unheard, or triggered
Conflicts driven more feelings than facts

However, in professional or high-pressure settings, combining emotional intelligence with clear communication is key.
Nevertheless, Vicky Kaushal’s advice highlights an important truth: people need emotional validation before they can engage in logical conversation.
As Dr Chandra explains, the most effective way to handle a “kalesh” is not to choose between emotion and logic—but to use both, in the right order.Story continues below this ad
This article is based on information from the public domain and/or the experts we spoke to.